Category Archives: bullshit and buggery

The right to be cranky…and crazy as hell.

I do love Garrison Keillor. The man is a wingnut after my own heart. His latest piece over at Salon is rife with hilarity and just outright batshit craziness.

Which is why I love Garrison..he is nucking futs.

The Big Dick Cheney™ is just shooting from his tired, old, decrepit hip. He is desperate and he is cranky at the thought of being tried for selling torture. That he keeps finding idiots that give him a soapbox to stand on simply amazes the fuck outta me.

How come someone doesn’t pull that damn box out from under his extremist ass? Let him land hard and possibly break that hip..then he would have something to take care of..his own self, and perhaps he would then go gently into the good night.

Or not. As long as Faux Noise is owned and operated by Murdoch the Magnificent..The Big Dick will always have a place to spew his fuckery and outrageous bullshittery. Now, a small slice of recent Keillor for your edification:

Only one out of five Americans is willing to describe himself or herself as a Republican these days, and frankly I am tempted to become one of them. For the variety, and because they need me and because when I heard former Vice President Cheney talk about the meaning of Republicanism the other day — “We are what we are,” he said — I felt drawn to the simplicity and dignity of that. And I have never been a Republican, just as I’ve never been to South America, and that makes it tempting.


I went to a party the other day and heard the word “torture” and said that I didn’t think we should prosecute the Bush lawyers who wrote those torture memos, and people jumped all over me like I was an escaped Nazi, so as long as I was persona non grata, I said some more stuff — that America would be a better country if we took the vote away from people over 65 because they are selfish and greedy and the future of America is its young. People about dropped their drinks. And then I said that cat ownership is a sign of emotional immaturity and a good predictor of a tendency toward violent crime. I saw lifelong friends turn away in disgust. And you know something? I Don’t Care. It felt good.

Liquor wasn’t the cause. Crankiness was. And crankiness is the birthright of Republicans.


As Mr. Cheney said, “We are what we are. We’re Republicans. We have certain things we believe in. And maintaining our loyalty and commitment to those principles is vital to our success.” A good thing to say, and many a president of the Elks, the Odd Fellows, the Moose, the Knights of Pythias, and the Ancient and Mystic Order of Hoot Owls has said something similar: We will not bend our principles so as to please people we didn’t like in the first place.

The real problem, as I see it, is that American’s are getting their collective panties in a wad over whatever the hell The Big Dick Cheney™ spews on a weekly or semi-weekly basis. Dick is like your batshit crazy uncle at the family reunion. Everyone is sickened by what he says, but no one will tell the old bastard to shut the fuck up. Everyone just rolls their eyes at Uncle Crazy and tries hard to ignore his voice gets louder and more shrill.

We, the universal we, need to ignore The Big Dick, or just make fun of him like it’s a fucking contest. The media evidently has nothing important to report lately as those are the assholes that keep tossing The Big Dick and his crappola into the limelight. The responsible media, the few that are still out there, need to just let The Big Dick run his piehole in the vacuum known as Faux Noise, and let it alone. If Face the Nation can’t find a fucking intelligent, sane individual for their Sunday morning… show, then they deserve to have their ratings plummet into the shithole basement of Neilsen.

Surely there is important news to feed us? Surely there is something timely and thought-provoking out there the idiots in the media can attach their broken down wagons to? If they don’t have enough ‘real’ news to give us, then the bastards need to retire or close down the business. Dick’s pov doesn’t make it true, nor does it make it NEWS people in the got that??

Because Garrison Keillor doesn’t write enough columns to fill the void of humorous or thought-provoking OpEd’s. I do love Eugene Robinson’s take on the Big Dick, but there aren’t enough Pulitzer Prize-winning writers out there willing to take on the tirades of our former Veep who evidently left his brain in the limo, along with his rifle and overcoat.

If you google The Big Dick under the ‘news’ get pretty much nothing but American Media outlets..I don’t find The Guardian wasting ink or space on Cheney..just the idiots in our media.

So when the next rightwing nutjob you know whines about that ‘liberal bias‘ in the MSM, just point to the millions of lines of tripe being spewed by the likes of ABC, NBC, CBS, NYT, LAT, or any other media outlet that keeps hyping Cheney and his pov on the Obama administration and Because sista, any media outlet that keeps giving Cheney space instead of telling us about the poverty and ignorance in Appalachia, the millions of humans displaced in Sudan, the legal raping of women in Muslim countries, the pollution that is coal sludge ponds or how GM’s new move to dissolve hundreds of retail outlets will affect your town or burg…well, they just aren’t worth the powder to blow them all to hell..along with The Big Dick Cheney™.

And we wonder why so many news organizations are closing up shop. Investigative journalism has taken a powder and in it’s place..we get The Big Dick Cheney™ and his asinine musings. Cheney, after all, is the man who sold us the Iraq War people!

…and we all know how that shit has turned out, don’t we?

Artwork filched from the wonderful Dark Black.
Crossposted at my group rant palace The Sirens Chronicles. Stop by and say hi..or piss off..something! 😉

The bonuses…its all about the damn bonuses?

I am really tired of this subject. AIG was not the only financial company to reward failure. Lehman Bros did too. Hell, I would be willing to bet all if not most of the banks and financial houses did prior to putting their hand out for that corporate welfare check.

Timmy Geithner needs to set the record straight on what he knew and when. Chris Dodd needs to name the ‘administration official’ that told him to change the language in the stimulus bill from wiping out all bonuses to letting a few of them slide through.

So what did the folks in the House of Reps do today? Why they passed a bill that smells totally illegal and taxes anyone that received a bonus or will receive a bonus…to the tune of a 90% tax rate. Retroactive legislation is rarely legal…they should know that. It was pure unadulterated theater folks! From CNN:

The measure would tax individuals on any bonuses received in 2009 from companies getting $5 billion or more in money from the Troubled Asset Relief Program, or TARP. Bonuses for people with incomes over $250,000 would be taxed at a 90 percent rate.

Yes we are outraged…but I think we are pissed at the wrong people…Timmy G and Benny Bernanke should be higher on our shit list than the folks that took the bonuses their companies were contractually obligated to pay.

Timmy has been on the side of the carpetbaggers since day one. Five bucks says he is the one that told Dodd to remove the section prohibiting bonuses.

And Bernanke knew about these fucking bonuses for months and never informed anyone in the new administration? WTF dude? He just moved up my shit list too.

Friggin carpetbaggers, and their friends in high places…kiss my brown ass. I hope all your names are released publically and you are shamed into returning those bonuses.

As for Benny and Timmy..they need to resign their posts…but they won’t. Obama can fire Timmy, but not Bernanke.

Alan Keyes-"Obama is a radical communist"

The entire quote from the wingnut, per Khastv:

“Obama is a radical communist and I think it is becoming clear. That is what I told people in Illinois and now everybody realizes it is coming true. He is going to destroy this country and we are either going to stop him or the United States of America is going to cease to exist,”

Ain’t that a freaking doozy? Jaysus Friggin Christ what a bag o’ batshit Alan Keyes is. It gets worse m’dear reader. He is still preaching that Obama isn’t a U.S. citizen. When the reporters snickered, he chastised them.

I dare you to watch the entire 3 minute bitchfest by Keyes below.

Mayor Kenneth Edwards busted stealing political lawn signs.

Bear in mind Mayor Kenneth Edwards states he did nothing wrong by removing the sign from someone else’s yard. From 5News:

Greenwood mayor accused of stealing campaign signs

5NEWS obtained the incident report filed by Greenwood police. In the report, the officer describes how someone driving behind a Toyota pickup claimed he saw that truck pull up to a house at Ware Road and Highway 10. The witness told officers the passenger got out and grabbed something next to the carport. The item in question was reportedly a “Vote no to extend the city sales tax” Sign.

The officer stopped the truck that had no license plate and he says that’s when he realized the passenger was Greenwood Mayor Ken Edwards. The officer called the police department to get instructions on what to do next since the mayor was involved.

The Sebastian County Sheriff’s Department was called in and the driver, Gordon Griffith, also of Greenwood, was given a field sobriety test, which he passed. Both men were released.

Someone in the comments actually calls the Mayor a terrorist for his actions..LMAO! Both the Mayor and the commenter are idiots and obviously wingtards of the highest order.
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Ted Stevens found guilty on all counts.

MSNBC has announced the jury returned a verdict…guilty of lying ole Teddy Stevens is. More info as it becomes available.

Update: Its available. Per ABC News:

A federal grand jury indicted Stevens, 84, in July on seven counts of making false statements, for allegedly lying on U.S. Senate financial disclosure forms for the years 1999 to 2006.

The jury of eight women and four men deliberated for five hours Monday before returning guilty verdicts on all seven counts.

Each charge carries a maximum five years in prison and $250,000 fine.

But Teddy will probably never do a day in jail…wanna bet? Oh, and check this out…he can still be reelected and serve! From MSNBC:

Despite being a convicted felon, he is not required to drop out of the race or resign from the Senate. If he wins re-election, he can continue to hold his seat because there is no rule barring felons from serving in Congress. The Senate could vote to expel Stevens on a two-thirds vote.

That, my friends, is total horseshit. Also get this, from McClatchy:

Now, voters will decide whether Stevens, who’s represented the state in the Senate since 1968 and before that helped usher in statehood for Alaska, should continue to serve as their senator. For the first time in his career, Stevens faces a competitive re-election fight, against Democratic Anchorage Mayor Mark Begich.
The guilty verdict will complicate not only his re-election bid but also the remainder of his term in the Senate. His colleagues have the option _ never exercised _ of voting to expel him before his term ends in January. Four U.S. senators have been convicted of crimes, historians note, but not one has received a presidential pardon.
The Justice Department has charged 11 people in connection with its corruption probe in Alaska, including five former and current state legislators in Alaska. Other than Stevens, five pleaded guilty, three were convicted by juries in Alaska and two await trial.

I can’t wait for Nov 4th. I want to see what Alaskan’s decide on this bag o batshit.

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