Category Archives: life sucks sometimes

Did I miss anything important?

I am back at the humble abode as Yuppie sista finally came home from her little Vegas trip. Dad is at her house in San Diego and his beautiful cat is staying w/the whack job neighbor. This isn’t the best place for him, but its the only place for him as he wouldn’t make it through the four hour trip to my place, plus he is an outdoor cat who has never known the world outside that complex.

Dad was a royal pain in the ass, wanting to keep all his blackened, soot-filled, water-logged stuff…most of it can be replaced, his memorabilia (pictures, war medals, commendations etc) were fine and intact…and to me, that is what counted the most. Arguments ensued and everyone in the family….none of which actually came to Escondido to help, think I am a real bitch with a cold heart.

I have no idea what has gone on in the real world, could you guys fill me in on the important stuff? Did BP go bankrupt or actually do something right, did Obama rent a set of balls and kick some Republican ass? Did the Dem’s call out the rightwing nutters who refuse to help those A LOT less fortunate than themselves and give them their paltry unemployment?

I haven’t slept in 48 hours, I ate once in those 48 hours and I have never felt this beat down…but a little sleep and a bowl or two of medicinal herb might do wonders for me.

I have Olbermann on the telly and Rachel will follow…hopefully I will fall asleep soon and miss all the ugly details of how rotten life is here in the US of A for a lot of folks…

Oh, they id’d the meth freak…he was burnt beyond recognition. Seeing as how he burnt four families out of their’s hard to drum up sympathy for him…they did find some kind of torch thingy that meth and crack folks use in the dining room…how they found anything intact in that place amazes me. Fire investigators have been crawling all over the place….which BTW..will be completely condemned as the roof is falling in on the two middle units. No fire walls between the units…so damage is from end to end.

The guy was a squatter in a foreclosed condo…the bank will be handing out checks soon we hope…but we aren’t holding our breath.

Dad had NO renters insurance. Thank heaven we do…  

Sunday sports day…..and the 4th of July..

I spent all day and night Saturday screwing around w/this friggin blog. I don’t know if it looks better or worse….and frankly my dear…I don’t give a shit at this point in time.

The FIFA World Cup is down to four…and Diego Maradona probably pissed down both legs as his team Argentina got their asses stomped Saturday by Germany 4-0. Sucks to be you dude!

If you, the reader, have a hard time commenting..I will just say fuck it and go back to ye olde blogger system…ok?

Enjoy all the damn fireworks and smoke and noise this evening!

Excuse me asshole?

I really thought I was one of ‘those people’ who would never get an ulcer..seriously, I did. I have no friggin problem vocalizing my pissed-offed-ness in a voice so loud, rank and obnoxious that people within a four block radius hear me and get ‘my point’.

Evidently…I was wrong because my father has been able to do the unthinkable…make me sick to my stomach and consequently going to the doc’s tomorrow to inquire as to whether an ulcer is in my immediate future.

Another thing he has done was push my buttons so hard and so often that I think a few of them are stuck in the on position.

So, with all that in mind, when the cunt-haired bitch in the pharmacy at Wally World, on Rosedale, jerked my chain really early this morning by announcing I would have to wait until 5pm to pick up a refill for my rescue inhaler…I almost stroked out…I swear I saw stars before I launched into a tirade that included announcing that I was calling a couple of friends I have over at channel’s 29 and 23 and ripping her and her fellow pharmacy employees a new one live on the five o clock news…about how I had to go to the emergency room which gawd knows is full of death and infections to begin with….because ‘they have rules’ and not being able to breathe doesn’t count with them.

I was told I should of called yesterday to refill the inhaler…even if I didn’t need it or fucking use it yesterday. I was expected to be clairvoyant if I wanted a refill and/or to be able to breathe like everyone else on the fucking planet…

Bear in mind I called the minute they opened. Maybe the 3rd minute…I ain’t sure. Also bear in mind that after talking to three of these ignorant employees, I was primed like no ones business when I finally got the pharmacist, aka the cunt-haired bitch on the horn.

I did not use any four-letter words…but I did use every long, four-or-more syllables, legal-ese word and legal threat I could think of..all with honey dripping off them..,ok that last part is a bit of a lie…but I digress…

Whilst I tore this worthless employee, aka the cunt-haired-one-in-charge a new ass, without being foul-mouthed, I was marching around in the living room like I was on a death march into a warzone…my guns…aka my voice…a-blazing.

In the end, I got one helluva walk accomplish in my living room, and my blood pressure was off the charts. I also got my inhaler within 2 hours of my call…simply unheard of in these here parts people!!

😉 It’s good to be the bitch….sometimes it is, ya know.

When the parent and the child change places…

Ok, so they couldn’t find out what made my Dad forget where the fuck he lived or how to get there.

They released him, into my care, yesterday afternoon. Round 4:30 pm to be a tad precise. I tell you the time because it’s important…

Every night he was in the hospital, five of them, he got batshit crazy and wanted to cold-cock anyone and everyone that was preventing him from walking out of the hospital, in his hospital nightgown and usually sans underwear.

It’s called Sundowners Syndrome. Take my word for it…it ain’t pretty and it’s scary as shit for loved ones and nursing staff that have to deal with it. You can not reason with them, you can not control them and they can and will hurt others if it’s not dealt with…usually by tying them to their beds when drugs fail to subdue them.

So…to say I was scared to death to take my father to his home at that hour, with just me myself and I to deal with him is an understatement m’dear friends. I was frantic, asking his doctor what to do if he went off on me.

Doc said…call 911, tell them to take him back to the hospital and pray they got there before he hurt me or himself. But Doc really believed he wouldn’t go into that mode and I had no choice but to trust his judgment.

I am happy to report Pops maintained all evening and remained lucid, aware and thankfully as close to normal as he could get. He was tired but so damn happy to be in his condo with his beautiful grey cat and me. For the first time in almost a week he blissfully slept through the night.

I slept or tried to sleep, on the couch in the living room…to make sure he didn’t get up and try to go for a stroll in his skivvies at 2 or 3am.

When he got up this morning, he was happy and relaxed and wanted to do his laundry at 6am. I said ‘go for it Daddy’ so he marched back and forth to the laundry room for about 90 minutes whilst I sat and pondered the huge changes that were coming to his life…and mine.

I can only care for him, here at his home in San Diego, for a month. My life in Bakersfield can be put on hold for that long. His doctor told him in no uncertain terms that he can no longer live alone because he isn’t eating regularly, taking his meds daily and drinking too much booze for a man of his age (80) with medical problems like RA, high blood pressure and a host of other issues that affect the elderly. His drivers license has been suspended at this point and the chances of him getting it back are…well, slim and none.

The task at hand is to make him realize the reality of his situation and the options he has, which are limited to getting a live-in caretaker (which he can’t afford) or moving into an Assisted Living home for the elderly. 

Needless to say, he flat out refuses to consider the second option. I do not blame him. But I also know that is the best of the two options. I wish with all my heart I could bring him to live with me and the Ball n’ Chain but our relationship has always been adversarial and our home is not somewhere he would be happy. Dad is conservative and I am a leftwing nutjob. I already have someone to care for…my husband who is 10 years older than I and dealing with his diabetes and other ailments. I have 3 blown discs that limit me to top it all off…..the excuses are endless.

I feel ashamed that I can not care for my father and his dementia. I am frustrated and angry that this falls on my shoulders. I have four other younger siblings who have a myriad of reasons why they can not take him. I understand their positions, believe me.

It’s weighing on me and I see no light at the end of this tunnel. Thanks for listening.

Painting: Alzheimers the Journey Painting by Yulonda Rios

Blues Dog..I know the feeling.

And from our “You think you got it bad department”..this lil guy makes me cry..and then feel like a pussified whiner.