Category Archives: The Big Dick Cheney

All the major nutters are in Bakersfield this weekend!

Yes, folks all the rightwing nutters that matter in the universe are most likely in Bakersfield, CA for the Bako Business Conference that starts this weekend. Full disclosure: I worked, for a very short time, for the law firm that hosts this nutterfest every year. They shitcanned me when they found out my political leanings were no where near the right. Showing up this year, just to name a few who will be getting paid big bucks to spew their fuckery are:

Richard B. Cheney (The Big Dick)
Dr. Lynne Cheney (his sidekick)
Laura W. Bush
Sarah Palin

Newt Gingrich

Mitt Romney
Eleanor Clift
Karl Rove

Rudy Giuliani

Michael Steele

Ain’t that a helluva nutterfest folks? All morning, the local news has been interviewing one of the fucktards who is putting this bs on. The word ‘patriotic’ has been used so many times I would be able to live comfortably for a while, if I got ten bucks for every time I have heard it come out of one of those fuckers pieholes. 

There is a….cough…special guest that is a secret every year. My guess is since both Cheney’s are getting paid and Laura crazy eyes Bush is also speaking that The Shrub will be the special nutter….I mean guest.If any of the folks from Nutter U say anything earth-shattering, I will of course blog it immediately. Odds are however, they will spew the same shit they have been preaching for the last six months.

I think security is gonna be tight for a grouping this large full of rightwing assholes….just tossing that out there.

Special Prosecutor? Perhaps…

Several media outlets are reporting this morning that Eric Holder is leaning towards appointing a Special Prosecutor to investigate the Bush Administration’s war crimes in relation to torture. The story they are all linking to is this one from Newsweek. An excerpt:

….Four knowledgeable sources tell NEWSWEEK that he is now leaning toward appointing a prosecutor to investigate the Bush administration’s brutal interrogation practices, something the president has been reluctant to do. While no final decision has been made, an announcement could come in a matter of weeks, say these sources, who decline to be identified discussing a sensitive law-enforcement matter. Such a decision would roil the country, would likely plunge Washington into a new round of partisan warfare, and could even imperil Obama’s domestic priorities, including health care and energy reform. Holder knows all this, and he has been wrestling with the question for months. “I hope that whatever decision I make would not have a negative impact on the president’s agenda,” he says. “But that can’t be a part of my decision.”

Upholding the law should be the only thing Holder thinks about when deciding whether to appoint a Prosecutor to look into the torture issue. AP adds this:

Holder is considering whether to appoint a prosecutor and will make a final decision within the next few weeks, a Justice Department official told The Associated Press. The official spoke on the condition of anonymity because he was not authorized to speak on a pending matter.

Come on Eric, do the right thing…go after these pompous fuckwits..please!

The Rethugs are not part of the solution, they are part of the problem. Alienating them is no big deal as the bastards have become the Party of No. There is no bipartisanship in fuck the bastards and go after Bush, Cheney, Yoo, et. al. Especially after this story hit the newswires. Dick Cheney is a liar and a carpetbagging douchenozzle. He relished keeping Congress in the dark..and actually had the CIA lie to them. No one deserves to be brought down like The Big Dick Cheney™. No one.

They are not above outright lying to us.

And that fact just totally pisses me the hell off. The obvious, blatant lies being spewed by The Big Dick Cheney™, Boss Limbaugh, Michael Steele, Boehner, et. al. are just incredibly disingenuous..and outright fuckery.

I missed The Big O’s speechifying this morning..but my dumb ass caught TBDC in all his glory. MSNBC showed Cheney’s entire speechifying at that massage parlor known as AEI. Cheney used a noun, a verb and 9/11 over twenty times this morning.

The Ball n’ Chain™ asked me to find something to do…away from the house for awhile. I was that bitchy after watching Cheney lie his ass off.

So I went out and about for a while, running household errands. But when I got home..Cheney and Obama were still on my boob tube. Tweety is now proselytizing about both of them along with former CIA spook Jack Rice, Lawrence ODonnell and that fucktard Pat Buchanan.

Larry looks like he is gonna have a stroke listing all the lies that Cheney told at AEI this morning. I know that feeling too after watching TBDC this morning. It’s hazardous to one’s health to watch that fucker for more than 60 seconds I think.

I am just not in the mood for these guys today. I am going to find a baseball game to watch until the Lakers game starts.

Because these fearmongering fuckwits just drive me to scream and holler like a mental patient.

It came from the office of the V.P.

Dick Cheney is probably the biggest bag of batshit in the Republican party, without a doubt. The former Vice President will not shut his piehole and folks inside the Rethug party are freaking out over his grandstanding bullshittery..but they are doing it silently..not publicly. A poll of GOP insiders just released by the National Journal shows that 57% of those folks are pissed the fuck off and say The Big Dick Cheney™ (TBDC) has hurt the Party Of No.
From the rightwing blogosphere comes totally different set of polling numbers on whether TBDC has fucked them without kissing them first, also from the National Journal. Seventeen rightwing bloggers were polled about what impact Cheney has had, helping or hurting the party, and its pretty friggin freaky if you ask me:
I do not ‘get’ how the numbers can be so opposite of one another. Both groups are party faithful and yet the stunning differences are, well, stunning.

A few quotes from the GOP insiders on how Cheney has screwed the pooch for them:

“Cheney has emerged as the GOP’s most visible spokesman. And you’re more likely to find WMDs in Iraq than independent voters who like the former vice president.”

“As the Republicans try to move beyond the political disaster of the Bush years, Dick Cheney is a surreal public presence that is hurting Republicans very badly.”

“Cheney’s comments about [Colin] Powell versus [Rush] Limbaugh will drive moderate voters even further from the party. Republicans need these voters and spokesmen that will attract them.”

“Cheney’s disapproval rating is 60 percent: He’s so unpopular that he probably couldn’t get a gig on an infomercial. He’s certainly not the right guy to become the face of a revived and repositioned Republican Party.”

“Cheney’s continued presence on the stage makes it harder for the Republicans to turn the page after Bush. And he sucks up all the oxygen in the room.”

“No-brainer: The guy opens his mouth, and he creates problems for the Republicans. They so want the Bush era to slide into history.”

Now, a few quotes from the rightwing bloggers on how Cheney helped the Party Of No:

“Dick Cheney has continued to articulate a coherent conservative vision. Those who loathe him will ignore or ridicule him regardless, but those who are neutral towards, or even like, the man, must appreciate his willingness to speak up.” Bookworm, Bookworm Room

“Dick Cheney has helped the country, immaterial of politics — just as he did as vice president. People who demonize him might just want to reflect that this is someone who could easily have retired in comfort a long time ago — and instead chose to serve the country, something that arguably took years off his life.” Robert Miller, JoshuaPundit

“Dick Cheney calls ’em as he sees ’em. The world needs more men like Dick Cheney.” Doug Lambert, GraniteGrok

Seriously, these rightwing bloggers just crack me the hell up! Loyal to the core those fuckers are!

And then, there is the fucktard known as Mary Matalin. Her pov on TBDC running his yap is priceless. From a WaPo writeup on whether Cheny helps or hurt the Party of No:

“If Barack Obama had come in and done what he said he was going to do and look at the stuff and see what is working, then Cheney would have continued to do what he was doing — working on memoirs, finishing his house,” she said. “He’s got a good life. He’s got stuff going on. He doesn’t care about being on TV. There’s no more politics there. He’s not settling any scores. He just wants people to understand.”

Matalin needs to sit down and shut the hell up too if she truely values the GOP. Over 60% of American’s dislike, if not downright hate, Cheney. She can not ignore that little tidbit of knowledge, or if she’s her funeral..or rather..the Rethugs funeral in 2012.

Taylor Marsh was polled by the National Journal on this question as well. He however is a lefty and I like his take on TBDC and how the bastard can politicize anything, including the issue of torture:

“Dems should be aware that Cheney has succeeded in politicizing torture. However, his real goal was drawing a line when he believes America became ‘less safe,’ which began under a Democratic president. It’s his cynical calculation that when we are hit, he can remind people that it’s Obama’s fault; he’s hoping for a new chapter in the right-wing ‘Dems are soft on national security’ talking point. Too bad you can’t ignore Bush-Cheney policies, including torture, which got us where we are today.”

The fact that people are taking sides on the issue of torture based on politics is scary indeed. My hope is that as long as The Big Dick Cheney™ keeps talking, the more Americans will distance themselves from the republican party and marginalize the mutha fuckas.

My final thought goes along with the next graphic, filched from The White Weasel on deviantart:
And I really want us all to remember the following line from Cheney the chickenhawk, thanks to 3rdtech also at Deviantart:

May Cheney spend eternity in hell with the rest of his disgusting friends. He can’t get there soon enough for me however, because when it’s all said and done…we must remember the demand to waterboard KSM came from the Office of the Vice President:

*Two U.S. intelligence officers confirm that Vice President Cheney’s office suggested waterboarding an Iraqi prisoner, a former intelligence official for Saddam Hussein, who was suspected to have knowledge of a Saddam-al Qaeda connection.

*The former chief of the Iraq Survey Group, Charles Duelfer, in charge of interrogations, tells The Daily Beast that he considered the request reprehensible.

*Much of the information in the report of the 9/11 Commission was provided through more than 30 sessions of torture of detainees.

Where in the blue hell is that Special Prosecutor Mr Holder???? Cheney’s ticker ain’t gonna keep pumping forever dude…

The right to be cranky…and crazy as hell.

I do love Garrison Keillor. The man is a wingnut after my own heart. His latest piece over at Salon is rife with hilarity and just outright batshit craziness.

Which is why I love Garrison..he is nucking futs.

The Big Dick Cheney™ is just shooting from his tired, old, decrepit hip. He is desperate and he is cranky at the thought of being tried for selling torture. That he keeps finding idiots that give him a soapbox to stand on simply amazes the fuck outta me.

How come someone doesn’t pull that damn box out from under his extremist ass? Let him land hard and possibly break that hip..then he would have something to take care of..his own self, and perhaps he would then go gently into the good night.

Or not. As long as Faux Noise is owned and operated by Murdoch the Magnificent..The Big Dick will always have a place to spew his fuckery and outrageous bullshittery. Now, a small slice of recent Keillor for your edification:

Only one out of five Americans is willing to describe himself or herself as a Republican these days, and frankly I am tempted to become one of them. For the variety, and because they need me and because when I heard former Vice President Cheney talk about the meaning of Republicanism the other day — “We are what we are,” he said — I felt drawn to the simplicity and dignity of that. And I have never been a Republican, just as I’ve never been to South America, and that makes it tempting.


I went to a party the other day and heard the word “torture” and said that I didn’t think we should prosecute the Bush lawyers who wrote those torture memos, and people jumped all over me like I was an escaped Nazi, so as long as I was persona non grata, I said some more stuff — that America would be a better country if we took the vote away from people over 65 because they are selfish and greedy and the future of America is its young. People about dropped their drinks. And then I said that cat ownership is a sign of emotional immaturity and a good predictor of a tendency toward violent crime. I saw lifelong friends turn away in disgust. And you know something? I Don’t Care. It felt good.

Liquor wasn’t the cause. Crankiness was. And crankiness is the birthright of Republicans.


As Mr. Cheney said, “We are what we are. We’re Republicans. We have certain things we believe in. And maintaining our loyalty and commitment to those principles is vital to our success.” A good thing to say, and many a president of the Elks, the Odd Fellows, the Moose, the Knights of Pythias, and the Ancient and Mystic Order of Hoot Owls has said something similar: We will not bend our principles so as to please people we didn’t like in the first place.

The real problem, as I see it, is that American’s are getting their collective panties in a wad over whatever the hell The Big Dick Cheney™ spews on a weekly or semi-weekly basis. Dick is like your batshit crazy uncle at the family reunion. Everyone is sickened by what he says, but no one will tell the old bastard to shut the fuck up. Everyone just rolls their eyes at Uncle Crazy and tries hard to ignore his voice gets louder and more shrill.

We, the universal we, need to ignore The Big Dick, or just make fun of him like it’s a fucking contest. The media evidently has nothing important to report lately as those are the assholes that keep tossing The Big Dick and his crappola into the limelight. The responsible media, the few that are still out there, need to just let The Big Dick run his piehole in the vacuum known as Faux Noise, and let it alone. If Face the Nation can’t find a fucking intelligent, sane individual for their Sunday morning… show, then they deserve to have their ratings plummet into the shithole basement of Neilsen.

Surely there is important news to feed us? Surely there is something timely and thought-provoking out there the idiots in the media can attach their broken down wagons to? If they don’t have enough ‘real’ news to give us, then the bastards need to retire or close down the business. Dick’s pov doesn’t make it true, nor does it make it NEWS people in the got that??

Because Garrison Keillor doesn’t write enough columns to fill the void of humorous or thought-provoking OpEd’s. I do love Eugene Robinson’s take on the Big Dick, but there aren’t enough Pulitzer Prize-winning writers out there willing to take on the tirades of our former Veep who evidently left his brain in the limo, along with his rifle and overcoat.

If you google The Big Dick under the ‘news’ get pretty much nothing but American Media outlets..I don’t find The Guardian wasting ink or space on Cheney..just the idiots in our media.

So when the next rightwing nutjob you know whines about that ‘liberal bias‘ in the MSM, just point to the millions of lines of tripe being spewed by the likes of ABC, NBC, CBS, NYT, LAT, or any other media outlet that keeps hyping Cheney and his pov on the Obama administration and Because sista, any media outlet that keeps giving Cheney space instead of telling us about the poverty and ignorance in Appalachia, the millions of humans displaced in Sudan, the legal raping of women in Muslim countries, the pollution that is coal sludge ponds or how GM’s new move to dissolve hundreds of retail outlets will affect your town or burg…well, they just aren’t worth the powder to blow them all to hell..along with The Big Dick Cheney™.

And we wonder why so many news organizations are closing up shop. Investigative journalism has taken a powder and in it’s place..we get The Big Dick Cheney™ and his asinine musings. Cheney, after all, is the man who sold us the Iraq War people!

…and we all know how that shit has turned out, don’t we?

Artwork filched from the wonderful Dark Black.
Crossposted at my group rant palace The Sirens Chronicles. Stop by and say hi..or piss off..something! 😉